Bad Girls Go Everywhere

Bad Girls

I just finished reading this sassy little book and absolutely loved it! Ladies, if you’re looking to be inspired, encouraged, and humored this will satisfy those cravings.

A few quotes….

“You know why God is a man? Because if God was a woman she would have made sperm taste like chocolate.” – Carrie Snow

“There is no point at which you can say, Well, I’m successful now. I might as well take a nap.” – Carrie Fisher

“Sometimes I have the most amazing moments of clarity. Razor sharp, crystal clear. It’s at these times I can see how fucking stupid I am.” – Tracey Emin

“It takes a good girl to be bad.” – Sophie Tucker

Authors: Kathryn Petras and Ross Petras

Enjoy Ladies – You’re Welcome!

Cannot Live Without These Shows – My Top 8

I’m sure there are Top TV shows blogged daily but thought I’d share mine with you.

Warning: I don’t have kids so these shows are not intended for family night.

Seriously, I am an addict for sure. TV and Food are my drugs of choice. I particularly love comedy and drama and something different and edgy.

1.) Playing House / USA: A side-splitting comedy about two best friends AKA Fresbians that live together and are raising a baby together. The quirkiness and chemistry between these girls makes me jealous and longing for a friendship like theirs. It’s Sure to make you laugh until you piss yourself. They’ve already had two seasons and are hopefully working on the script for the third. Maybe you can check it out on Demand? Not sure if it’s on Netflix yet.

2.) Ray Donovan / Showtime: Nail biting, suspense, bad ass and sexy as fuck. Liev Schreiber is a “Fixer” and is so HOT. The cast is phenomenal. It’s somewhat comparable to The Soprano’s but this family is from Boston. They’re not mobsters but a bit close to it. Thrilling!

3.) Luther / BBC: This show has ended but you might be able to catch this on Netflix: It’s sick, twisted, creepy, freaky and will possibly give you nightmares. But, with Idris Elba and Ruth Wilson it’s off the charts one of the best dark and psychologically charged shows out there. It makes Criminal Minds look like a Disney show.

4.) Black-ish / ABC: The characters are so fantastic on this show it’s like you’re friends of theirs. You feel like these people could be your neighbors. It’s Urban, Black Culture, Hilarious, and heartwarming. You will scream with laughter watching this show. Guaranteed.

5.) Transparent / Amazon Original Series: This show is a comedy-drama and has a lot of dark humor to it. We honestly fell in love with this show. Jeffrey Tambor is the father that is transitioning into a woman. Talk about a lot of heart and emotion. This show brought the process of transitioning to the forefront for me. It came out before Bruce Jenner did so this way all new to me. I have a completely different opinion about this topic after seeing this show. My heart goes out to the people that are going through this. It’s so worth watching. Cannot wait for the second season.

6.) Shameless / Showtime: This my friends will help you to appreciate your family whether it’s dysfunctional or non existent. Watch this show and you’ll need a shower afterwards because you’ll feel so dirty. It brings trashy to an entirely new level. It’s hilarious, sexy, DIRTY, and a Train Wreck that you can’t pull yourself away from.

7.) The Mindy Project / Hulu: This show was originally on Fox. I would sooooo hang out with Mindy Kaling! She’s fabulous! I want her wardrobe. I think all females can relate to her. She’s a gynecologist and shares an office with a few other doctors and they will keep you rolling in the floor with laughter.

8.) Peaky Blinders / Netflix: At first you might want to turn your volume up to 70 on the TV because the british accents are very thick in this gangster series. It’s a time piece as it’s set just after the First World War. Tommy Shelby is a BAD BAD boy and he will make you want more. He’s the lead character and he’s one of those brooding mysterious brits. You’ll find yourself watching the series back to back and then after it’s over you’ll come back wanting more. You’ll have withdrawals when it’s over. You might even start speaking their language a “LIL”.

So, there you have it. My Top 8 TV Shows that are totally worth watching. Hope you enjoy! If you watch something that I’ve suggested please leave comments so we can dish about it!

Well Behaved…..Yawn, Stretch, Zzzzzz

How many times have we all heard “Oh Behave”? I’m not talking about the funny Austin Powers shit. I’m talking about your parents telling you this at a wedding or your supervisor at work mentioning it to you. Boring……who the hell wants to behave?

As badly as some of us would like to behave to please our parents, co-workers, supervisors it’s just not in our best interest.

Are you unusual? Quirky? A bit bizarre? I know I am to some people and it freaks them out a lot. Sure, I’m a woman. I wear lipstick, jewelry, and smell nice. But, I’m twisted and freakishly insensitive to others around me.

Filter you say? What the fuck is that? Put a muzzle on it? Try it, you’ll get a throat punch quicker than you can say HELP.

Of course I can turn off my bad ass four-letter words at work to some degree. I would never use profanity speaking with a client. But, there has to be some release and that is my vent sessions with co-workers or with friends or better yet here on my blog.

In the south, the majority of society down here still thinks women shouldn’t be so blunt or speak their mind. We should be more ladylike and serve sweet tea with pie. Well, it’s 2015 fuckers and it’s a whole new world out here. Censoring strong opinionated women is absurd.

It feels good to make noise and be a woman. We’ve got balls. Ours are just on our chest. We need to stand out and be heard. We have something to say. Be crazy about yourself and daring. Never let life break you. Be you and rebel as often as you can get away with.

Because behaving is just too fucking tedious.

XOXO

Twisted Little Jingle You Might Fancy

Morning Loves….

This is one of my favorites. When you’re having one of those insignificant shitty days and nothing seems to be going right, this song always puts a smile on my face.

It’s especially beneficial if someone has royally pissed you off. Fuck You never sounded more beautiful before hearing Lilly Allen sing it. What a fucking fabulous song! You can just wonder the halls at work humming along to it with your beautiful smirk at life.

Guarantee you’ll get a kick out of it – Enjoy!

Self Stimulating Monday Morning

Warning: You’ll now find that I have a twisted mind if you didn’t already know this. Some might say this is X-Rated – Maybe not? Anyway, consider yourself warned.

On with the Monday Eve prep….

As I was thinking about motivating myself and anyone who reads my blog for Monday’s circus at work tomorrow – I thought…”Self Stimulation!”

How about a big hot cup of yourself tomorrow morning?

Twisted as it may sound, why not fuck yourself before work? It will bring that “Go Fuck Yourself” to a whole new level. Everyone masturbates right? Why not do that on Monday morning to start the day off with a BANG?

If you have a significant other pounce on them first thing tomorrow morning and spread the motivation so their Monday isn’t so boring. Give them a piece of your swag to take to the office with them.

I mean who doesn’t feel fantastic after an incredible orgasm, how could you possibly have a bad day after getting off?

How many times do we run into someone at work that if you gave them a straw they’d suck the happiness right out of you? Don’t we all think to ourselves “Damn, he needs to get laid.” Well, lets all get laid tomorrow morning!

I need motivation every Monday Eve like the Pope needs his rosary beads. I know, I know, I shouldn’t reference the Pope when blogging about masturbating. I have a warped and twisted mind. Didn’t I mention that in the beginning of this blog? You couldn’t help yourself could you? You had to keep reading.

I believe it’s possible that we might just walk into work as a Limited Edition. We’ll ooz confidence so much that we give off this ora of “fuck you, I’m the shit” without ever opening our mouths.

So, on that note, go fuck yourselves in the morning loves and enjoy every second of it. Monday is going to be Fantastic!

XOXO

Charming On A Monday?

How about we pump ourselves up for Monday shall we?

The week is about to begin and I don’t know about you Loves but something inside of me dreads Monday’s.

I’ve relaxed and had so much fun this weekend. I don’t ever want it to end. But, as we all know…..it’s about the dolla bills ya’ll.

What if we all wake up tomorrow and instantly hit the ground running with the idea we don’t need validation from anyone. We’re wearing our favorite shade of armor of course that’s our lipstick and everybody needs to get out of our way because we’re gonna kill it.

Doesn’t that sound magnificent? Who’s with me? Let us be proud bad ass women tomorrow!

Let us remember that we’re invincible and we’ll make this Monday our Bitch!

Have a great day tomorrow! XOXO

Walk & Talk Like A Boss

Look. You can have negative thoughts about yourself all you want but not on my watch.

One of my very favorite quotes EVA is…..

~ If your not being treated with love and respect, check your “Price Tag” perhaps you have marked yourself down. It’s “you” who tells people what your worth by what you accept. Get off the”Clearance Rack” and get behind the glass where they keep all the VALUABLES.. Bottom line is…VALUE yourself! ~

Seriously, think about it for a minute will ya? Isn’t this so true? Do me a favor and copy and paste the above quote into your phone or wherever and look at it as often as you need to. Remind yourself that you are dazzling and extremely valuable.

Confidence is so fucking attractive! Not only is it attractive to the opposite sex but it’s attractive in everyday life. It’s insanely contagious. Others want what you’re having. You feel me?

Think about what you have to offer. What are the positive things about yourself that you like? Write them down if you want and drill it into your mind and pump yourself up. You have something to offer.

Is it Intelligence? Your Smile? Heart Of Gold? What about your wit? Maybe you have fabulous hair? Do you have a beautiful singing voice? Are you funny? There is something in each of us that we bring to the table and it’s dying to get out and be seen or heard.

When I say Walk & Talk Like A Boss, are you thinking “What the fuck? Who does that? How do I even do that? This sounds so stupid.”

Nope, it’s really not hard to do and it’s soooo not stupid. Transform your mentality and celebrate yourself. As corny as that sounds…think about it. You set the tone for how people see you.

It took me ages to get my confidence and swagger. Yeah, I said it, I’ve got swagger bitches. I really wish I had it when I was younger. I realized I had swagger when I was around 32 years old. I had finally accepted that I was curvy aka big boned (what they call me in the south) aka thick aka chunky and the list goes on.

I love myself, even the fat rolls. If someone doesn’t like it or appreciate it then that’s too damn bad. This is me and I’m not going to starve myself to look like the celebrities, models, and so on. I’m beautiful just the way that I am. Plus….I love to eat! If someone says they hate to eat, something is very wrong with them. Run! You don’t need that kind of negativity in your life whatsoever. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Accept who you are and get on this swagger train because it’s a thrilling ride that you’ll thoroughly benefit from. Choo! Choo!

I honestly think if you accept who you are, what you bring to the table, it will transform your life. Put that new shade of red lipstick on or fellas that new cologne and when you look in the mirror tomorrow morning give yourself that “Sup” nod like “How you doin?” and swag yourself right out the front door to work.

Move out of the way world because you’re bringing it!