Don’t Worry I’ll Save You

How sound do you sleep Loves? Do you wake up during the night when you hear the slightest little thing? Or, do you sleep through anything?

I’m a pretty light sleeper. My hubby is out of town this week so it’s just me and my 16 year old pup. The pup being older and all has to get up and take care of business every two hours.

It’s like having a newborn I suppose. Of course I wouldn’t know anything about a newborn since I don’t have any kids, that’s a whole different blog in itself. I’ll tell you about the “no kids thing” another day or maybe tonight.

Here’s the thing, my hubby sleeps through thunder, rain, barking, or ANYTHING for the most part. The pup walks all over him trying to wake him up sometimes to go out but he sleeps right through it. The pup is 20 lbs and let me tell you, when he walks all over me I have a few bruises from it. He’s a stout little mutt.

So, I sleep with a butcher knife on my nightstand while the hubz is away and I am ready to stab a mother fucker if he should come at me and the pup.

I often tell my hubby, “Don’t worry, I’ll save you.” We laugh about it a lot but for real, I will protect my people, no doubt.

In my warped mind….I imagine myself as if I’m an assassin and have catlike reflexes and grab the attacker by the back of the head and put the knife to his throat and say to him “Guns are too quick”. One of my favorite quotes from The Dark Knight by the way.

But, in real life I’d probably trip and fall on the knife and bleed out and the intruder would take everything we have. My pup would lick the intruder and he would probably give him a treat and my hubby would sleep right through it. That would be just my luck.

My imagination is demented isn’t it? This all stems from watching too many kick ass movies and TV shows like Taken, The Equalizer, Homeland, Ray Donovan, and the list goes on.

Needless to say don’t break into my house bruh unless you want to get stabbed, just sayin’….

 

 

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4 comments

  1. sheldonk2014 · November 19, 2015

    I sleep like the pea is under the mattress
    There are those rare occasions I can sleep through anything
    I have protected myself though
    Just recently and homeless person stuck his hand into the car ,the window was rolled down, while I was on the phone parked
    And I went all ballistic on him
    Mostly cause he scared me
    A knife
    Maybe a baseball bat
    Sheldon

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Josh Wrenn · November 19, 2015

    I sleep hard now, but only lately. I also have a huge knife close to the bed. It is so big I couldn’t carry it in public. I’d slice a mofo if they broke in. But I don’t have anything worth breaking in for, so if I hear a noise it is probably just my cats.

    Liked by 1 person

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